YY
.Wednesday, December 22, 2010.
exams are over! doesn't sound much of an appealing idea after all - when you know that its the last dec hols before you graduate. no more holidays when one starts working. *sighs*
YY
.Tuesday, November 23, 2010.
i don't like how school tends to suck the life out of me. it's tough to sustain interests in other more exciting things around when you're trying hard to cultivate the mood for studying, lest sustaining the interest. and ya, keeping up with the pace when there's so many things going on.
YY
.Monday, October 25, 2010.
cousin's wedding dinner's tonight. this period seems like it's time for the 1980s babies to wed. i like this theme, classy chic retro shanghai theme. i know it's stupid but i fantasized about my personal wedding list while sending off guests to their tables at the reception.
i'm living in my big fat useless dream. have to poke a hole soon. it's not going to happen!
YY
.Monday, October 11, 2010.
a china box, or what ang mohs call it, filled with jumpy little stuff. pretty much sums up what i think: period of uncertainty now.. i'll never know how i'm going to feel tomorrow and what's gonna happen. (at least i know i'm feeling relieved today after finishing with 2 important quizzes)
YY
.Saturday, October 09, 2010.
something is telling me to not stop holding on to the foolish hopes and dreams i have. i shall give myself a grace period of 2 years upon graduation, and then stay rooted to sg. maybe.
YY
.Saturday, October 02, 2010.
goodbye july.
he was almost saved by a phone call by someone keen to adopt him. however when we called up SPCA, he was already put to sleep. and everything happened barely 3 hrs after we left him.
a phone call a little too late, my last min decision not to see the injection process, and the last day to return the old house keys - what else can i say? 心酸.. the past 11 years with july reeled past, and i still remember everything. he will be a nice and heartbreaking memory. and i think i don't want anymore dogs after thunder. i'm going to devote my weekends to spending more time with her now
YY
.Thursday, September 23, 2010.
Moon jelly / Aurelia aurita / ミズクラゲ
some things are best left hidden away from the world.
~
busy week with a single project. and lesser tutorials as compared all the semesters i had. nonetheless i was still kept busy.
YY
.Monday, September 06, 2010.
i'm truly convinced that life is unfair, in many ways and situations which you have no control over, but in many ways you can deal with that damned situation. this requires more effort though, it just runs you down, breaks you apart and questions your perserverance.
everyone's optimism is wearing thin now, the worst is happening, but there's really nothing else we can do. "i wish" doesn't exist in my dictionary anymore. what's worse than worst i can kind of imagine it, but i still wish it won't happen.
let go or hold on, that's just it. just a single thought of letting go and it is over. for this i have come to believe the decision dad made best addresses the situation.
no mood for studying at all :p
YY
.Friday, August 27, 2010.
just added a counter - for fun, and a playlist widget, i ❤ the colour scheme i created. nice songs to listen to while thinking through stuff, when you're drinking coffee or watching the rain. supposed to soothe the mind, i need more of these when school starts i guess.
祸不單行 or misfortunes never comes alone. there's been a lot which happened lately at home. have met up with hopelessness many times at night. still wondering but not giving up i guess.. i think there's nothing else everyone could do but to hold on. dad said i seemed "unconcerned" about everything, but please pardon me the nagging. everyone already their own share of worries, till i don't want to talk about it anymore. right now the best i can do is to continue giving lots of support.
YY
..
YY
.Wednesday, August 18, 2010.
YY
.Monday, August 16, 2010.
holidays (without traveling) seems to bring out the best of the nuah in me. there seems to be so much lethargy in everything i do. and how much i love sleeping. been eagerly attending many gathering with friends, brings back goood memories and of course the company (better when it's with beer/coffee.) probably because i know that come 2 weeks later i'm gonna be deprived of these when i'll find myself once again self-absorbed in school and everything surrounding it. --- i kind of wondered what has led me to feel this jaded. i feel i need to get out of s'pore again, haha but i don't know what for. being out there makes me feel more alive, in control. and what i've read from a friend's: i'm/we're "living in a sterile bubble called SG". i couldn't agree more..
i haven't really been doing nothing so far, i'm not a total piece of nuah sai, i've been packing my stuff into boxes yep cos' we're moving house, and being a dutiful daughter helping out with the housework. (oh of course not as hardworking as my dear sister, but haha less antsy.) i would love to find a job if i could, but situations permit me to stay put a home as the best solution.
(ps: best viewed with IE)
YY
.Tuesday, August 10, 2010.
YY
.Monday, August 09, 2010.
SU17's over! headed back with yanli as helpers to the programmers. seriously tiring as we had tasking for every single event. it went smoothly fortunately and the weather was way too good. i am in a very serious chaota state, the tannest in my life. way darker than an average malay. had much to comment on the camp but i shall not rant it out loud here, events which i thought were a real success was sea sports, my #1 favourite event and su16 event. for the rest either i wasn't too involved to be able to comment on it or i thought it wasn't up to last year's standard. after this year's of graduating programmers, i'm not too sure if i should stay hopeful..
YY
.Saturday, July 31, 2010.
i gotta feeling that next sem's gonna get me real busy. job/masters hunting, house moving, overseas trip planning and a cGPA to maintain.. and SU17's coming! our last camp before we graduate, so why not help out and get soaked in the fun atmosphere and relive our freshie (and programmer) days..?
cheers to the 4 sub groups: MSG, J. Co, Franksters and 黑社会. i could tell much effort has been put into all the planning, but how everyone translates all that planning into a concerted effort remains a challenge. screw-ups do/will happen and it's up to us programmers to react swiftly and come up with a counter-plan.. 加油!
swam for the first time in 6 months. as usual, i'd acquired a swim suit tan line. and we visited her today, feels better and i hope things will get better. we need to come up with a plan, somehow.
YY
.Tuesday, July 20, 2010.
it seems weird, but i must be suffering from denmark exchange withdrawal symptoms. occasionally i find myself thinking through random events happened during exchange. in one instance while i was trying to sleep in Stansted Airport on transit to Copenhagen from Edinburgh, i was thinking through everything that happened during the greece-turkey-egypt trip.
and today when i boarded the bus, i thought i saw chulmin. and while going home i thought i saw daichi. when u look at random people at any random occasion, various insignificant thoughts comes to your mind - u can analyse their faces and attires, create stories about their lives and backgrounds, or predict their destinations or whatever. whatever, but they reminded me of those in containers. must be really missing everyone. all these yearning might stem from the dissatisfied life i'm leading back home, possibly..?
later tonight, yanli said on msn, 'life there is so dreamy'. once more, memories from the past 6 months poured out. damn, feeling slightly emotional. i don't know how and why, i start to think of people and events, who i travelled with and to where, container life, etc. anything about everything basically. aish, i really miss everyone, more than how i used to miss any other people. they are all really nice friends whom i wanna stay in touch with. how are u guys doing back home?
met up with some progs today, feels so nice and homely. and also the crossers for dinner at funan's TCC. really HAPPY! catched up a lot. time's limited and i hoped we have more time together, catching up and looking back. too bad zzz is flying back to melbourne sooon. feels great to have a bunch of girlfriends whom u can talk about anything to all these while.
true that i can't escape the social norms and responsibilities. i have to find a stable job with a decent income, to repay the loans and not accumulate interest. probably i'll end up as a grumpy and jaded office lady after graduation.
http://www.cinemablend.com/new/An-Illustrated-Guide-To-The-5-Levels-Of-Inception-19643.html
what the heck is that? it reminds me of taking a photo of someone who is taking a photo of someone, stuff in layers.
YY
.Saturday, July 10, 2010.
i'll be home real soon, in a week. it feels so weird, as though i've already gotten used to life overseas, i already feel like an expartriate living in europe. i've long missed home, my family and friends, every single and small familiarities, behaviors and patterns around me. like sleeping on the train on my way home from school, or getting free fastfood discount coupons.. though home is where the heart wants to be, i don't really have the urge to go home, yet. not that the friends i made here are better than the ones back home, or living in Denmark is better than in Singapore; it feels as though i am not over and done with europe, or exchange. there is still so much more to learn and explore. the only consolation is that even that i am back in copenhagen, everyone else has gone home, so no point staying longer in denmark.
whale and dolphin research expedition at the Hebrides of Scotland - something i'm glad that i've finally done it. the number of times i puked on the boat never beats the moment i see a basking shark, fin and full body upclose, and when the minke whale surfaces. there was lots of infomation to gather about them from this trip.. they're changing their feeding patterns, locations.. while we can't pinpoint the exact reasons, there's a lot to believe that it's due to human activities. fish farms everywhere are equipped with this acoustic deterrent device 'ADD' to discourage seals, porpoises and dolphins from coming close to their salmon.. the high frequency ranging clicks it produced are so irritating, when i heard it on the hydrophone. olly the scientist said that seals might be willing to go deaf to steal some fish, but i guess it have somehow harmed the dolphins and porpoises negatively, forcing them to avoid such places where they usually are, and look for alternative feeding spots. aish.. human activities. what the Trust aims to do is to get a better understanding of the animals residing in the Hebrides, gather more data and knowledge, to equip stakeholders with better understanding of the natural environment before they introduce a policy.
life on board the Silurean is surprisingly pleasant! i thought as the only Asian i'll somehow get lost in their conversations, which i did, but it turned out to be a fasinating experience. there was an old English couple, 2 ladies from USA, and a girl living in Scotland. there was lots of sharing and telling, lots of open talk and fun. i really like them all. the skipper and first mate are really great people. i'll put some photos up on fb soon.
lastly, the summer trip to greece, turkey and egypt was SERIOUSLY GOOD FUN. the company and places. the best trip of my lifetime. there's too much i can say but that's all i wanna say.
once everything's over all's left is for one to reminicse and savour every memory of the time of our lives, i think i need lots of time for this..
i have a new motivation to start working and saving up so that i can go to korea, japan and thailand.
YY
.Thursday, June 24, 2010.
back from the long trip to greece, turkey and egypt. too overwhelmed to recount everything that had happened. been too many places, experienced too many things. i had so much fun, not feeling tired even that i'm back in copenhagen. 1 more day and i'm off to scotland. (:
YY
.Monday, May 17, 2010.
i need to get stronger. go ROX
and it seems like i'm not going to be in denmark for the whole of june.
YY
.Friday, May 07, 2010.
was sort of stunned while stumbling onto something on fb. woah, i do feel happy. was a little stunned at myself for still feeling stunned, perhaps numb. hmm why? as for the other case, pure hopelessness turning to apathy. haha. i'm happily evolving into a nun.
things at home feels chaotic on the inside. one simple decision to move has tons of implications. me over here, can't control what's going to happen to july and thunder. there are other considerations as well. i'll miss serangoon gardens for sure. life stops here and everything over in singapore doesn't stop as well. pending problems grow, and become significant for one to care about the time it become troublesome. heartache every night. i miss home, but sometimes i don't want to go back to it. of course i got worried and i rather go home in the end. i need to be there for biaojie. should i start finding a home for july and put up july on fb for adoption? ):
after i reach home, time to add some dollars to my account. i will look for a part-time job, perhaps in jurong point. no more $!
